ANCESTRAL ENERGIES, TIMELINES, PATTERNS
A MESSAGE FROM DIJANA
My mum and I have been talking about our family a lot lately; sometimes about our immediate family and sometimes about our extended family members.
Sometimes the conversations are informative and insightful, and sometimes we simply reminisce about the old day, about the 'old country'.
But at all times our conversation offer healing, compassion and great deal forgiveness.
And we need to heal our family pain. Pain passed on from generations before us, yet still established in our present lives.
In our last conversation mum brought up stories her Grandfather, my great-grandfather, used to tell about his brother, Lazar Nesic. Lazar Nesic is considered to be somewhat of a WW2 hero in Subotica, the town we come from and where I was born and raised. There's a High School named in his honour and he is celebrated for his bravery and distinction.
Lazar was only 38 years old when he was arrested and executed in the town centre.
Mum tells the story .."the family was very worried about him (Lazar). There was a small group of men (about 20 according to archival historical records) that led demonstrations against Germany occupation. Most people at the time didn't believe that anything was wrong, that Germany wasn't dangerous. But young people didn't want to go to war again. It had barely been a decade since the last war. Everything changed and happened very quickly, in fact so quickly that our family never really recovered from the shock and the grief of it. One day the army of the Austria-Hungarian kingdom were leaving and gone, and the next day German troops were occupying the town. The day of the occupation German soldiers showed up at the house and arrested Lazar. By that afternoon he was executed publicly in the the town square. The family didn't know what was going to happen to him and when they found out it was as if a big dark cloud had come over the whole family, never to be lifted again. Even after the war when the (then new) Yugoslavia was honouring him as one of the first to organise resistance, the family didn't want to have anything to do with this. They wouldn't seek compensation or any public or official recognition. No gain was ever made from Lazar's death."
As stories get passed on, much can be embellished simply by the default of perception. I decided to check and see if there's any official account of these events. I was shocked and saddened at just how accurate the story that mum was told, actually was. It felt chilling.
I found archival articles and pictures of that time (see above). The pictures I include are in chronological order; from the initial demonstrations to the occupation, the battle, the executions, etc. *I will include the links to the relevant sources below.
I cried. And then cried some more. I cried for a few days. It felt like I had made contact from inside of me with that energy of deepest grief my family had held, and passed on, for 4 generations. This grief was now coming up to be healed through my awareness.
I gave this grief permission to course through my body, to surface so that this cycle of emotional darkness, oppression and depression can finally be transmuted.
The other truth of that time was that, once Lazar was executed by the occupying troops, the WHOLE family was labeled as traitors and they lost everything! All the homes, the land they owned, their business', EVERYTHING. They barely survived.
Fast forward to today.
I can see how traumatic life experiences back then influenced the chemical and unconscious behavioural make-up of the generations that followed, including me, my brother and sister.
I can see that we were raised in an environment where survival behaviours were activated almost all of the time. Fight, flight, freeze or fawn was textbook behaviour looking back. What I mean by this is that we inherited behaviour highly atuned to being afraid and always looking over our shoulder. Lack, or poverty, consciousness was also regularly trending in my childhood. I was often told to work hard but not to expect to get anywhere with it. When I achieved something big in my life, I was told not to get a 'big head' instead of being encouraged and supported. All these little things come from fear of loss, the fear that sits so deep within the gut that it becomes a gut-wrenching 'friend'.
If you ever get a chance to find out a little about your ancestry, your family tree, you might find this really super insightful. It might help you understand more about yourself, the why's, the where's and the how's.
Let me know if you have a family ancestry story to share, something that might be useful and in service to others. And thank you for reading my family story.
*Links used:
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GUEST WRITERS
It is my honour to introduce Guest Writers to the DIJANA ORG Blog. Please help me welcome:
Luca Orlandi
Jenny Smith
Lillian Brummet.
In the spirit of expanding our entrepreneurial collaboration (they are all current + future podcast guests), I have asked these wonderful holistic practitioners and experts in the their field to join me in publishing articles/blogs that will contribute to enriching our knowledge, understanding, intentions and wisdom.
Look out for new blog posts over the next few weeks!
There are so many more wonderful projects in the works at the moment. I look forward to sharing them with you in due time.
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NOVA WHOLISTIC©️ Episode 14 with Anna Rodin
TIMESTAMP:
03:00 Welcome and Intro
04:00 Here's Anna
07:20. Survival reaction vs Conscious changes
08:45. Being really strict with herself
11:00. Conditioned to be 'perfect'
12:40. Focused on 'getting through it'
13:40. Teen numbing
16:00. Drink to mask
17:00 Sober-curious
21:00 Break down to break through
24:00. Healing starts
26:00. The challenges of healing
27:30. 'Outing' herself
30:45. Mixed reviews
33:00. From understanding to embodied knowing
34:10. I'm healed (??!!)
35:35. Deciding to write a book
37:20. 'For Your Twenties - A Guide To Staying Connected Amidst The Chaos'
39:30. Writing - a deeply intimate moment
41:00. MindBodyEmotionSpirit routine
44:20. Self-care is not negotiable
48:00. Intention for the book is to start a conversation
50:30. Hopes, dreams and moving forward
54:00. Communities engagement
55:20 In closing and last words
56:20. Thank you Yoda :)
Thank you 🙏
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COMING UP
NOVA WHOLISTIC © Episode 14.5 with Michal Stawicki
Streaming on Tuesday, Feb 7 2023
@ 12 midday AEDT
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